epiphany

it finally dawned on me
the answer


and, like watching a film in reverse, it
made sense before
it ever happened...


and after it all
happened


we met... and we knew
(each other)


it couldn't work...
there was a reason
(there had to be)


but then you asked
and i answered


and we were
truly
(godammit)
tried to be


flying (we became a comet)


elated~


the taste - we had
both promised
this would happen...
and we did


      deja vu
                               echoing
lives past


words words words
countless strings of seaweed
in our sea - i resent them
every day


games and twisted
tongues and lies
i hate them all


before words
we were


perfect


and we still are


and I hum in my
silence, my eyes
shining, a million
broken hearts


were my own


i mourned for
every lost
possibility of us
and now
              looking back


i see

fuego

i was never able to resist

playing with fire

staring so deep

investigating oranges, yellows and blues

deeper and deeper

until you feel a disturbance in your whole field of view

you see back through time... 

how fire kept man alive

something that commands respect

while it can warm you 

it's relieving to know 

i have no control

tie me up

throw me in

watch me burn

Depends.

Peter bought a crate full of Pampers from Sam's Club (which I will forever say that I hate but still buy their diapers - so. much. cheaper.) So Peter puts them all up, and we literally had diapers coming out of our EARS.

And I neglect to put any in the diaper bag and drive to East Memphrica for my yearly physical with Kito (Elekito), and OF COURSE he immediately takes a fat dump as soon as we pass through the doors and he thinks, "hmm.... mama is retarded.... i bet she doesn't have *grunt* any *grunt* diapers" *grunt followed by caustic stench*

And the doctor has to do the whole physical with stink-butt right in his face until he can't possibly take it one more second and finally says, "Um, what's the deal? You don't have a diaper?" Translate: How can you possibly ignore this mind-blowing smell that you have subjected me to against my will? I will force you to make it go away. You sick f*ck.

So I literally had no choice but to TAPE a diaper made for an 85-year-old onto my child's tiny yet filthy ass. Oh, the shame. Elek wrapped in medical tape and Depends.
I couldn't stop shaking my head and Elek was waddling like a pregnant woman (he is FAR PAST the waddling stage) and so I shake my head and say "Indeed." to which Elek replies:

"In-doo-doo-bedeeeee"

Indubitably.