***IF YOU DON'T WANT TO THINK OF ME DIFFERENTLY, STOP READING NOW****
Okay, so I quit Master Cleansing on Day 4... which is to say... I did the Salt Water Flush... (more butt-pee-- that oddly resembled lemonade-- which made me think of all the hilarious but horrible things I could do to people I hate.... hee hee... "delicious filtered lemonade") so... me being retarded... I pooed my pants on day three.. wasn't sure if I ACTUALLY pooed my pants... so i smeared it on my face which CONFIRMED my suspicions... at least I was at home while I was TWENTY-SIX YEARS OLD AND SHITTING MY PANTS! and smearing it on my face!!!!! WTF?!?! I'm having a hard time forgiving myself for that one. I figure if I post it on my public blog it will somehow help. Megan? Sharona? Crystal? What say you?
I got really weak and a really bad headache and ate a salad as my act of surrendering to my body... the headache left immediately. I went to sleep happy and skinny. That was day four. Holy Crap... then day 5 ... I woke up and Salt Water Flushed.. ate one small biscuit ... I wasn't able to eat much at all. Then I made my world famous sausage and ground beef spaghetti since Peter was having major cravings. I ate one helping and woke up at 11 pm praying that my intestines weren't rupturing. The upper part of my stomach acted as if I drank a fifth of (INSERT CHEAP TEQUILA HERE) and immediately sent me running for the bathroom. Nothing happened other than insane nausea, sweating, and swollen face. My dinner would NOT go down my tummy. It was just sitting there like a freaking hand grenade of sausage spaghetti waiting to blow me to smithereens. Now, the really odd part about all of this is how NON-poo-centered this whole feeling was. It felt like my stomach had gotten really really really small.... then I ruptured it with my dead pig dinner.... then it tried to digest it... think of a snake swallowing a wooden chair... and then about five hours post eating my body was like... "that's it you stupid bitch.. get the dead pig OUTTA HERE!" so that would explain the near-puking reverse-swallowing feeling... but I have pretty much the most stubborn gag reflex of anyone I have EVER come across and I can't vomit or induce vomiting to save my life (literally). So I somehow slept through the night and was very surprised that I didn't wake up dead. Now, I can barely eat ANYTHING... I mean ANYTHING... and I'm vegetarian for the most part... I don't know if I will ever eat red meat again. My poor body and butthole hate me!!
I think I'm about 147-150 right now.... I'm not going to weigh myself until I feel even thinner since I just don't want to be obsessed with numbers, but I'm aiming for 135 lbs. for my wedding... I'm eating REALLY healthy.... bananas, salad, Naked Superfood drinks... and very small portions. So that's the update. COMMENT... I want to know what you think and/or would you ever try this??!?!?!?!